


Never Knew You (不认你)

by zhou fenghuang (bootlegphoenix)



Category: Original Work
Genre: Amnesia, Boys' Love, Chinese Character, M/M, Original Character(s), Original Fiction, Read, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-30
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-11-12 08:00:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18006968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bootlegphoenix/pseuds/zhou%20fenghuang
Summary: Zhong YuNan woke up from a month-long coma, diagnosed with severe amnesia. Everyone around him in the hospital looked familiar, except for this one man. The one who reached out to him, the one who claimed to be his boyfriend. "What the hell? Impossible!" Waking up to find out he was a jobless twenty-two year old who quit his job one year ago, and this devil was the cause! The suspicion arises, what in the world would happen for such an innocent-looking sheep to actually make him voluntarily surrender himself to a head-on collision with a vehicle?!author's edit: oh, please ignore this. i swear i work on my other projects. this one is dead.





	Never Knew You (不认你)

One day, he couldn't remember when, he was admitted to the hospital. Knocked out for almost two weeks. He woke up with amnesia, stared at the people who surrounded him like a caged animal. He saw his family, his parents, but the first person to reach out to him was a young man.

"YuNan, do you remember me? Recognize me?" the young man, with messy brown hair and tired eyes, grabbed his shoulder forcefully. The words were clogged in YuNan's throat, he couldn't find the words to say.

"You... are?" he tried, after much difficulty, and managed to spit out only these two words. His throat was dry, painful to speak, and his words were soft and almost incoherent.

"YuNan, do you really not remember?" YuNan's elder sister spoke out for the young man. Her eyes held a trace of sympathy. "He is Zheng MingYu, your boyfriend. You two have been... engaged for almost a year."

YuNan froze, his eyes were slowly trailing over to the man, MingYu, trying to find confirmation. This guy, his boyfriend? Engaged? He was a homosexual? Whatever happened before, he didn't remember. He only remembered that he was supposed to take the mid-year assessments for his second year of senior high school.

YuNan remained silent. He had nothing to say, because he really did not know this guy. Watching the silent YuNan, MingYu reluctantly peeled his hands away from his shoulders. Inaudible mutters surrounded YuNan as the small crowd before him discussed amongst themselves before dispersing, leaving him with the doctor and his parents.

"Zhong YuNan, how old are you?" once confirming that nobody else lingered, the doctor began to ask.

With not a sliver of hesitation, he answered, "Sixteen."

"A-Nan, what are you talking about? Your birthday was three months ago, you're already twenty-two." his mother told him. Her sentence was firm, but her voice was almost quivering.

YuNan wasn't an idiot. He knew that he previously got into an accident, causing him to end up like this. He only heard about it before, didn't expect it to happen to him. So, what now? He seemingly couldn't remember anything from the past few years, only thinking and feeling like he was sixteen, still studying in senior high school.

He was Zhong YuNan, twenty-two years old, engaged to Zheng MingYu. He quit his job as a lecturer one year ago, and did not seek for another career since. His current situation was because he got involved in a truck accident. The doctor told him it was suicide. If it was suicide, what was he running away from? If it was suicide, why didn't he choose a more direct method? He felt like a caged bird being introduced to the wild after many years of captivity in the darkness. He only saw himself as the sixteen year old Zhong YuNan, not knowing who he was after that.

As his mom retold the gist of events that happened before his accident, Zhong YuNan was in a daze. So, for this person called Zheng MingYu, he quit his job as a lecturer? Stayed at home like a little housewife to take care of him? His life had so many opportunities, but somehow he just woke up and was told he threw it all away for this one person– this one person who was the same sex as him –and he didn't even know the reason behind it.

How did he ended up being a homosexual? How come his life was so pathetic? Jobless, didn't make money, only stayed at the home of this person whose existence he forgot all about. YuNan thought that he had a very steel-like, very stubborn heart, and was very passionate about his future. But in the end, he threw away his bright future, threw away his passions, just to be with someone? And even more so, a man.

He couldn't believe it, didn't want to believe it. Impossible. But even still, when he saw that man, Zheng MingYu, he felt as though he was supposed to know him. It felt like he bought a sequel novel and read it before reading the first book, completely new and unfamiliar, yet felt like he knew what happened before.

YuNan covered his face with his hands, his breathing a little difficult. Still, there was a tiny beeping alarm at the back of his head telling him to stay away, start anew, live a life without this person involved in it. The only question was, how? And it turned out that they were already as far as being engaged. Even though he was stubborn, his conscience was still very, very weak. Getting hurt by others, he would choose to forgive and forget. Hurting others, physically or mentally, he couldn't think about it. In his mind, he wanted to leave a good image in other people's eyes, so they wouldn't hate him, so they wouldn't think he wasn't so great. But for this person, could he do the same? That tiny alarm that was warning him to stay away, was it sighing in relief because of this? Because he lost his memories? Just how terrible was the past few years that he lived, to the point that the him then wanted to commit suicide?

After some time, he was discharged from the hospital. MingYu who offered to help him adjust immediately got rejected by YuNan. " _If it's adjusting to my surrounding, I can do it myself._ " were the almost-spiteful words that YuNan told MingYu. It seemed almost like he hated MingYu so much he didn't want to see him, even though they were engaged, even though he couldn't– didn't have the heart to –take the ring on his middle finger off.

Even though he would be living in the same house as this person now, YuNan would avoid him every now and then. Often, going through whatever was in his room, trying to find anything that accounted his years before. But, just as if he never existed then, he couldn't find anything. When he asked MingYu, he got nothing. MingYu didn't want to tell him anything else, just told him that they were engaged lovers, liked each other very much, and so...

Just like that, almost half a week since YuNan's discharge had passed. Today, it was the fourth day since. His weak conscience has already starting to mutter, forgive and forget, just as the tiny alarm inside was just getting cozy.

"YuNan." the apartment's door opened quite slowly, and in came Zheng MingYu, just got off of work.

YuNan didn't verbally response, he only turned his head to look at the man, his eyes like beckoning MingYu to continue on.

"I..." it seemed like MingYu wanted to say something, but nothing came out. In the end, he only let out a chuckling sigh as he walked towards his room. "No, it's nothing. Just wanted to see if you would still talk to me."

"MingYu, can you tell me?" YuNan asked, for the second time. Though he didn't say tell what, it was very obvious. His hand unknowingly clasp onto Zheng MingYu's arm, preventing the man from walking away.

"You have to remember by yourself." MingYu bluntly told him, lips sealed tight; not daring, not wanting, to tell him anything regarding that matter. At most, his same-as-before reply only made YuNan frown, gripping on his arm even tighter, making it so that it would squeeze the life out of MingYu, even if his arms were the one that was suffering.

"Cannot remember."

YuNan took in a deep breath as his eyes trailed over to MingYu's soft and gentle eyes, like an innocent person's.

"Even just a little memory, you cannot remember? I don't mind even if it's a small memory of us, if you can remember it, I'm fine with it..." MingYu painstakingly peeled YuNan's hand from his arm. Because his grip was so tight, it even left some red marks on MingYu's skin. His eyes became a little gloomy as he continued to speak. "YuNan, do you know how.... how painful it is when your lover wakes up from a coma, but they don't remember you? Or they seem to hate you? YuNan, I... tried for so long, but in the end, this is how you prefer our relationship to be..? It's fine even if you hate me, I just don't want you to ignore me, treat me like I don't exist, because you don't remember..."

The pitiful expression looking like he was wronged, it made YuNan slightly wince in his heart. "MingYu, I- I don't hate you." he tried to apologize; if anything, it was his fault, because he was being a jerk and ignoring his supposedly-his-partner just because he couldn't remember anything and he couldn't believe that he was a pathetic gay.

MingYu just stood silently, he didn't say a thing. YuNan felt the panic in his heart rise, like the feeling when you hit someone on impulse and they start bleeding. "M-Mingyu, I'm really.. I-I didn't mean it like that, I'm really sorry, seriously!" YuNan hastily tried to reassure the other man, but instead, his words got tangled up. Seeing YuNan act as if almost desperate, MingYu's eyes lit up, only by a little.

"YuNan," MingYu spoke. His tone was soft, same as when YuNan first woke up from his coma. "It's okay."

YuNan didn't grasp what exactly did his ' _It's okay._ ' mean, but from then on, he let go of his suspicion of MingYu and slowly opened up to the latter, often feeling bad for treating him so rashly without taking into consideration of his feelings. If this was really how his life was before his accident, then he would swallow his resolve and take it. Besides, Zheng MingYu wasn't that bad in any category at all: he was nice to look at; his voice was the gentle and soft kind, the type which would make girls fall head over heels in love; and most importantly, he wasn't annoying. In fact, YuNan thought his personality was a little okay. He wasn't the type of person to cling onto someone's thighs and cry out their name in a pitiful manner when he was being ignored– if YuNan wanted the space, MingYu would let him, except that sometimes when he saw MingYu's slightly disappointed and pouting face, he would immediately feel guilty.

Despite YuNan overthinking about this one certain matter a lot, the day where MingYu would come, push him on the bed and fulfill his carnal desires, never came at all. In his mind, he was secretly sighing in relief, maybe it was a little too soon for his mental health– he didn't care if this body had done it before, if he didn't remember it, he obviously wouldn't remember how it was like, he really had to take some time to mentally prepare himself; after all, MingYu was a man, as a fellow man, even YuNan couldn't understand how he didn't want or feel like doing it. But furthermore, as a fellow man, YuNan also couldn't understand why this innocent-looking sheep had to practically hover over him and watch his every move, it really felt too much like MingYu was treating him like some vulnerable woman that needed to be protected, couldn't be let near any other guys. To be straight, he was also a man! How was a man not allowed to have male friends and talk to them? Something like this was incoherent bullshit to YuNan. Soon, he had to talk this matter out to Zheng MingYu. It didn't matter if he wanted to listen or not, he would still force him to listen. Did he look like some exotic pet to be kept at home, only can look at, but cannot touch? Did he look like an idiot who would stand by and watch as this person dubbed as his lover slowly caused his social life to go down the drain?!

"Ahem, Zheng MingYu," YuNan cleared his throat before speaking. This was a serious matter, whoever who thought it was fine must be a blind idiot, YuNan thought. Even if he was a woman, this was still taking it too far, there was no difference in situation whether he was a man or a woman. "Just... how long do you intend to put my social life under house arrest?" 

"Ah?" MingYu's expression looked as if he had just misheard something. Three extremely thick black lines appeared on YuNan's face as he slammed the table angrily.

"My social life! Mine! It's not that I hate you, but even I have friends, if I don't talk to them, they would probably forget me, what grade elementary-schooler am I that you have to keep track of who I talk to?!" he didn't want to shout that loud, he was being considerate and only raised his voice a little, but he felt that in the next second Zheng MingYu would most likely start pouting again, being the elementary-schooler instead. The unfamiliar panic slowly seeped in as MingYu remained silent, and YuNan braced his conscience.

"Alright then." MingYu spoke, his voice low. His eyes didn't meet YuNan's. His arched back, his head hung a little low, it created the feeling of him being wronged or forced once again. It was always a wonder why this often cute and cheerful-looking puppy would always show a dejected expression whenever a small occurrence like this happened. This time, Zhong YuNan steeled his heart and gratefully accepted MingYu's consent. The gazing-downwards Zheng MingYu, who expected YuNan to say something after that, looked up with a glint of surprise in his eyes as he watched YuNan's back walking towards his room. His downcast expression was soon replaced by a light frown as he returned to his respective room as well.

The night passed in silence. That night, YuNan constantly tossed and turned in his bed, unable to sleep, causing him to wake up quite late. With MingYu's permission– or so say, with MingYu's agreement –YuNan had very eagerly promised someone he remembered as his friend from his freshman years of senior high school. That person was Zhuji Shen. When he heard that YuNan had woken up from his coma, he was extremely concerned to the point where he almost exploded in disbelief when MingYu denied him entrance from YuNan's ward back in the hospital. That, YuNan didn't even know until Zhuji Shen messaged him about it. Even YuNan thought it was stupid, and even more so, slightly suspicious. Just before he left, Zheng MingYu busied himself with being YuNan's substitute mother, cupping his face childishly in his palms as he continuously spewed out the same phrases, " _Don't stay out too late.... Be sure to come home early... Call my if you're eating out; if you need a ride back, just call me..._ ". Zhong YuNan painstakingly peeled away from the very-reluctant-to-let-him-go MingYu, finally stepping out of the door after a prolonged delay. He hadn't ventured out for some time; the world outside was quite different from what he remembered, he also no longer stayed at the slightly-peaceful residence of his parents.

Without Zheng MingYu restricting his actions, Zhong YuNan was like a dog let out of its cage. Though at first, Zhuji Shen wore a worried expression when they finally met, but it dispersed when YuNan reassured him that he was fine. Thus, they spent the whole afternoon reminiscing. Shen filled in on the details that YuNan had forgotten about since the crash, but it wasn't very much for a few years' worth of memories. Deep inside, it felt as if some parts were deliberately left out, either forgotten or just for the listener's sake. Nevertheless, YuNan brushed it off. Strolling down memory lane while his irrecoverable memories would never surface again; it didn't feel like his life, but more like reading out of a novel. The seconds ticked by, slowly but gradually, like dew dropping from a leaf. Unbeknownst to Zhong YuNan, his so-called beloved Zheng MingYu impatiently waited for his call, waited for him to return, like a dog who would wait for its owner even for eternities– except this waiting dog was only getting restless, impatient and furious with every growing moment. For the three times he rang YuNan's cell, all he ever got was redirection to the male's voicemail. The doubt started to kick in... perhaps it wasn't a good idea to let YuNan be alone with that Zhuji Shen after all. But just as he thought that, he unmistakably heard the familiar loud and cheerful chatter from the other side of the door, and it wasn't long until keys could be heard and the entrance door was soon unlocked. MingYu watched from a distance as the two young– but older –men indulged in a minute conversation before waving one another off, words too inaudible for the Zheng MingYu standing in the living room to hear.

When Zhong YuNan turned around after locking the door, his expression paused for a while went his gaze met MingYu. The younger man's expression was hard to describe, it was partly made of anger and partly made of disappointment, discontentment; very much similar to the expression of a girl when she finds her boyfriend cheating, but there was a slight difference, giving off an imperceptible look of hostility, yet there was mostly clouded dismay expressed on Zheng MingYu's face. "...I'm home." YuNan muttered, keeping his voice low and cautious. Like a teenager, he forgot about the time, the incomprehensible curfew set to him by his _boyfriend_ , and about almost everything MingYu reminded him of before he stepped out of the house, simply because he was too caught up in spending time with another– which in the end, was far more appealing than staying at home and wrapping himself up like a human zongzi.

YuNan took a moment to consider before apologizing, "I'm sorry." though his words did not hold that much guilt, it was still partly sincere.

MingYu's expression did not change upon hearing YuNan's apology, instead, he walked over to YuNan, their eyes didn't gaze directly into one another before MingYu planted a small kiss on the older man's forehead. YuNan was startled, throughout his short time with MingYu, because he never once initiated anything, it led to YuNan lowering down his guard and not bothering to protect his precious chastity anymore. "Zhuji Shen..." when MingYu spoke of his name, his gentle flowery-like voice was tainted with an indescribable loathing and hostility that was so faint, YuNan wasn't sure whether he heard right. "That man didn't do anything to you, did he?"

The question startled YuNan much more than when MingYu merely pecked him on the forehead. "Did not.." YuNan regained his breath as fast as possible so that he could reply to MingYu's question without seeming hesitant. Nothing happened, he was just simply startled and it took some time for him to calm down. Hopefully, MingYu did not misunderstand it for something much more different, else it would have been quite troublesome if he actually did.

Zheng MingYu pulled YuNan into a tight embrace, buried his face into the latter's shoulder, muttering, "I'm glad you are being honest."

Although the stature and bodies were not that different, YuNan felt as if Zheng MingYu was constricting him like a boa to its prey; his chest and shoulder were beginning to ache. The stubborn MingYu didn't seem like he was about to let go, stubbornly holding him so securely like he was scared YuNan would run away for what reason– this sort of pure and innocent feeling. Even though he was being wrapped by MingYu's arms like a human zongzi, YuNan still patted his back like comforting a little puppy. MingYu was annoying at first, when he recovered YuNan thought he was some clingy bastard, but he stopped ignoring him, then the 'clingy bastard' became an adorable, sometimes-too-over-protective puppy. With his looks and personality, why didn't MingYu fall in love with a girl instead?

**Author's Note:**

> hello, it's the author. though i'm not sure to update.... i do it randomly. my writing skills isn't that great, i was writing a chinese story this time, so i tried to not use my usual style of writing (...tainted from reading too many chinese novel). it's just the start of the story, but i hope it has potential, hopefully i don't drop it again.. orz. i wanted to write 4k words per chapter, i fell short on this one because i didn't know what else to write (i'm a hermit crab with no social interaction? how i'm supposed to writhe my character out of awkward situation... hm). my updates are slow or maybe never in a million years, but i will try to make the chapters long (and sensible). i hope you like the first part of this story... though i cannot guarantee second chapter will ever come (but i actually took time to think about the plot, although the character aren't as dear to me as my other stories, i was actually serious about this story, so hopefully i will try to finish it. brain cells, gambatte?)


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